I imagine Kris Jenner as the kind of lady who drinks tequila in high ball glasses while ordering around her staff of 20 year old interns. She seems like the kind of lady that has achieved a certain level of success and believes with that should come access to everyone in Hollywood. But I think what she fails to see (somehow) is that the rest of the Hollywood doesn’t really see her as playing on the same field. Again, the entertainment business is much like high school. The A-list actors would never sit at the same lunch table as reality stars, much less their parental management. Someone like Jon Hamm from Mad Men sees himself as an entertainer because he performs soliloquies from a script written by talented writers and directed by Emmy award winning visual artists. They see the Kardashians as bottom feeder who waste an half hour of good air time talking about vaginas and makeup.
Apparently at a pre-Oscars fundraiser this month Kris Jenner tried to approach George Clooney who dismissed her.
“She was determined to get close to him. She was telling her friends that she had to talk to him, saying things like how gorgeous his place in Lake Como must be and how she would love to have the family be invited to stay there,” the eyewitness said. “But when she finally got near him, he didn’t even look at her. He wasn’t having it.”
So this is what I imagine a conversation would have gone between Kris Jenner and George Clooney had he actually made eye contact and made small talk.
Kris: George, hello. Kris Jenner. We’ve met a couple times.
Clooney: I have no recollection of that ever happening.
Kris: This is some party, isn’t it? I’d like to host next year’s at my compound in Calabasas.
Clooney: I doubt that could happen.
Kris: I’d love to talk to you about working together. As you probably know…
Clooney: I know nothing about you.
Kris: I am looking to get into movie production. I love what you and your team have done with your stuff and I’d like to get on board.
Clooney: With what?
Kris: I’d like to help you produce the kinds of stuff you guys have been doing.
Clooney: I don’t think so. We’ve already got a development deal with Sony and Harvey. My team and I are really invested in producing films about political satires and historical dramas.
Kris: Oh, us too. Kim and I. We want to make a movie about the Armenian struggle.
Clooney: Okay, it was nice speaking with you.
Kris: (While yelling as he quickly walks away) I love your place on Lake Cuomo. Can you recommend a realtor? Maybe my family and I could stay with you and shoot Kim and Kanye Take Italy?
Kate Casey is a Pop Culture Lover. PR Pro. Soon-to-be New mom again. Comedy nerd. Celebrity gossip fan. Follow her on Twitter @KateCasey